Monday, February 9, 2009

Call from the wild.

Simba calls today wanting to know what color hair is on a heffalump. Like I know? Do I have a PhD in Heffalumpology? She then tells me that since I now have a blog, she decided to make one too. *Heaven help us all* The thing you must remember about Simba is that she is an ed-u-ma-ca-shun major and plans on teaching the youth of our country. * Heaven help us all, again* And to make matters worse, she graduated top of her class.

Now before I get on with my motherly rant let me tell you what she said this past weekend. Simba is doing a work-study and is observing a elementary class in action. I asked if she was actually talking to the students and she said "no, why?"

Mrs. O: Well.....what was the name of the ship the pilgrims sailed over on?
Simba: The Santa Maria.
Mrs. O: **Dumfounded look on my face**
Simba: Oh, oh, the Santa Clara.
Mrs. O: **Still dumbfounded look on my face** The what?
Simba, Mom, you always confuse me on this one!
Mrs. O: This is why I was asking if you were actually talking to the students.

Um yeah, and she is going to TEACH little moldable minds. Scary eh? Here I thought our children’s teachers were all brilliant but what if they all thought that the pilgrims came over on the Santa Clara? Or that Thomas Edison is on the nickel or it takes her 10 minutes to come up with the capital of Chicago and can’t figure out Chicago is a CITY and not a state.

So I vamanos over to her blog. Go head, read her stuff, I’ll wait right here. Done already? Ok. I had to call her and leave a message for her to call me back pronto.

Mrs. O: Simba, do you even read your blog before you post it? You should use a word editor.
Simba: Oh, Mom!
Mrs O: You don’t put ‘idk’ in your blog and what about grammar and typos. Fiends? Didn’t you mean friends? This is a blog, yanno writing, not text messaging.
Simba: Oh Mom! It is my blog blah blah blah…
Mrs. O: Ok fine, but you put garbage out there, I hope you know I will be forced to reply on my blog about your blog.
Simba: Oh Mom!
Mrs. O: You state in your blog you are quiet – you expect me not to respond to that? You gotta be kidding me! You said you are rarely on the computer, you can’t expect me not to comment.
Simba: Oh Mom! It is my blog blah blah blah……
Mrs. O: Great, now I am going to spend my time just doing bloggy responses to your posts. **Sigh**

And I was all worried that she was going to blog about her collegiate exploits for which she and I established a very good rule during the holidays. We have embraced the military mantra of “Don’t ask, don’t tell.” Because seriously, I don’t want to know every single stinking thing she does, who she does it with or how she does it. Not like I didn’t do the same things, and did them better, I might add, when I was her age. However, I didn’t tell my parents about ANY of it! I was smarter than that. Hopefully, she will learn that lesson soon and maybe come to recognize what the Mayflower was! She probably thinks it is a special flour cultivated in the spring months to make muffins with!



I have you know, that i do know what the mayflower is, though whenever you ask that question you confuse me, plus history is NOT one of my strong points, at all. Also i don't plan on teaching English, math is my thing, plus i only have to teach the basics of writing in Elementary school and by the time I graduate I'm sure I will have it down. I have three years to go and I'm not perfect.

I have you know?
lowercase i's?
capital E in elementary?

I rest my case.

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